My family and I went on vacation to Hilton Head a few weeks ago. We spent our days at the beach, playing board games, and kayaking. Best of all, I completely disconnected from everything back at home and was able to fully relax.
But this peace didn’t last long when we returned home. As soon as I started digging into my work emails, anxiety hit me hard. Nothing was on fire, but I still couldn’t help feeling overwhelmed by all the tasks I had to do and all the projects that were incomplete.
I couldn’t put this worry aside those first two days back at work, even at the end of the day. So the next morning I decided to go to confession to see if that would help me get back to zero. And it did help a little, but my anxiety still lingered, weighing me down.
As I left church and headed to my car, I checked my phone. I had to jump on a call with a coworker next. This coworker happens to be a friend too, but even so, I didn’t really feel like getting on the call.
I reluctantly dialed him up as I pulled out of the parking lot, the ringtone sounding through the speakers once, twice, before he picked up:
“Hey, Jonathan! How’re you doing?”
That simple question stopped me in my tracks. I could go with the usual, “I’m good. How’re you?” Or I could be honest and tell him what I was really going through.
I took a breath and then rushed in with the truth:
“Hey man, I’m not doing very well.”
We spent 15 minutes after that talking everything over. I shared how frustrated I was, knowing I had no reason to be anxious, but still feeling it anyway. He listened and simply gave me the time and space to talk, instead of trying to solve my problems for me.
And by the end of our conversation, I was laughing and feeling lighter than I had in days. My anxiety was still there, but it was something I could more easily distance myself from. I could see it as something I was facing instead of something that I was living in.
This little perspective shift helped me reset both emotionally and spiritually. And my friend’s kindness made me realize just how essential good friends are and how grateful I am for all those I have in my own life.
As Catholics, we put a lot of emphasis on prayer and the sacraments—and rightly so. These are very important parts of our faith that help us grow closer to God.
But I think it’s also worth remembering the importance of friendship and the fruits those relationships can bear. Compassionate friends can help us grow in virtue and point us towards God, whether in the little moments of our joys and sufferings or in the big ones.
If you don’t have these kinds of friends in your own life yet, it’s certainly worth praying about. And if that’s you, here’s a short prayer you can use to get started:
Heavenly Father, help me to foster friendships that will nurture my faith, help me to grow in virtue, and lead me closer to You. Amen.
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